But have you thought about the signs around you that aren't as blatent? Have you thought about the signs that a child needs your attention, that someone is trying to tell you something, that somthing bad is going on. I remember trying so hard to clue someone in that I was praying that they would understand what was going on and call it out on their own, so that I didn't have to betray my biological-father--the military officer that had abused me, raped me, had sex with me, threatened me, and called me all sorts of names over the years---that maybe, just maybe someone would be clued in...that someone would say something or call him out.
That I wouldn't have to be the bad guy---I kept thinking.....please someone take bull by the horns and call the kettle black! I remember thinking what is wrong with all these adults in my life.....that there are so many of them in my life daily, teachers, scout leaders, youth group leaders, lunch ladies, playground monitors, friends, relatives.....WHY AREN'T THEY FIGURING out the clues that I am dropping??? Are they as manipulated as the rest of my family so much that they don't even see what he is doing??
He wants to go a ski trip with his daughter alone, he wants to take the boat out and fish alone with his daughter, things that most kids would love to get to do....most things that a father and daughter should get to do with NO STRINGS....never the case in my relationship with my father. Not in my world....ski trip---scary, what is he going to do to me...what is he going to expect....Fishing boat trip out on the ocean---OH GOD HELP ME!!!! What is that going to be like, if I need to scream, NO ONE will hear me!
My biological father was moving out barracks that he lived in a city called Wiesbaden in Germany. I was so excited to go and help him clean the barracks...maybe this time was different, just love me as who I am, just tell me you care, tell me you love me as your daughter, not as your sex slave, or your "fill in", or your daughter that your having sex with, or the daughter that you expect to take care of your sexual needs.
STOP AND PAY ATTENTION...what is going on around you? What behaviours are children starting to show that are different-see what they are---DO SOMETHING, SAY SOMETHING, HELP. I am not saying that you shoudl be looking for signs of abuse around every corner, but I am saying---PAY ATTENTION!!!!
Please read some of the signs below, Love to you all, praying for lives to be changed!!!
Possible Behaviorial Signs of Sexual Abuse
Sexually-precocious or attempts to mask seductive behavior
Hides secondary sexual characteristics
Attempts to be unattractive
Abnormal sexual knowledge
Radical mood swings
Sense of danger where he/she lives
Change in eating habits (bulimia, anorexia, or compulsive eating)
Apparent boredom w/age peers and age appropriate activities
Nightmares, insomnia, sleepwalking and other sleep disturbances
Radical change in school performance for better or worse
Fearful about certain people
Depression, crying episodes, etc.
Expression of "damaged goods" syndrome
Angry, hostile or aggressive behavior
Fear of adult or adolescent
Fear of being photographed
Anxiety reaction to authority figures
Fear of undressing or refusal to undress in gym class
Pseudo-mature/overly-compliant or accommodating
Regressive, babyish behavior
Intense efforts to gain attention/affection from adults
Spending inordinate amounts of time in game rooms, arcades. etc
Recruiting other children to become involved with an adult
Suicidal thinking, gestures, and attempts
Hints regarding sexual behavior
Fear of nurturing/withdrawal/impaired ability to trust
Find reasons to not go home (helping teachers, etc.)
Neurological and verbal expressive delays
Killing/torturing domestic animals
Fear of the dark
Find reasons to not be with someone they used to spend time with (or any
change of behavior toward a friend or family member).
Unable to concentrate, daydreaming, 'spacing out', 'in a world of their own'.
Withdrawn, isolated, or excessively worried.
Excessive or early masterbation.
Starts sucking thumb or fingers (toddlers and young children).
Becomes a perpetrator, targeting a child, sibling, or friend.
Fear of parent leaving her.
Inappropriate kissing in young children.
Nervous or fearful around adults.
Not wanting someone, including a parent, give him/her a bath.
Bowel movement accidents in older toilet trained children.